one of those nights

our song came on

and it made me think of you

and I miss you more than words can say

this is where this all stems from

i know it

but i wont face it

i cant

its just so fucked up

but on a positive note

if i die before i pay back my student loans,

it dissappears (my family doesnt pay them)

which is really good to know

fdjafsdkfa

I have nothing to say anymore

life is good

and I just want to destroy it all

that is so fucked up

I'm so fucked up

CJ

oh violet...

I don't care how pretty you used to be

or that we were best friends

(ok I do care. a ton, but that is besides the point)

you are fat now.

chunkier than I am

and it makes me smile so much

but at the same time,

I just wish you would get skinny again

because you are so much prettier skinny

(also, I say this every year, but I am so so sorry)

CJ

revolting

I'm gonna live off mints

and gum

and coffee

and tea

for the rest of my life

and be miserable, because that is what I fucking deserve

pthetic

fucking pathetic

CJ

New Year New...

So I am back from Costa Rica and my vacations

and though I enjoyed almost every second of them,

I am glad to be home, to get re-focused and get back to the daily grind

I will probably be making a new blog here soon,

I feel like I'm not the person I was when I started this one anymore

I dunno, we'll see

CJ