Salut!

Quick update:

been working tons lately

focusing on school for exams

Marcus and I are doing superb

I have been binge and purge free for a couple days now (binge=5, purge=3)

and...

I'm down to 99+15.0 !!!!

I've made a plan to get down to 99+8.0 by june 23rd (going to take my time and leave room for plateuas) It is 7 pounds in 5 weeks

The only problem I see will be me getting to them gym

but now that I have a proper car, there is no excuse anymore!

Have a great long weekend, I'll check back in soon!

The sun is shining and so shall I

Ladies and gents!

I am down 3 pounds.

.2 from my first weight goal.

I can feel and see my ribs and shoulder bones again

this is putting me in such a good mood for the weekend

even though it is snowing again

and I am in flip flops

but who cares, cos I am happy

lalalala

Have a fabulous weekend!

oh ps- food for thought (ahaha i hate that expression): Has globalization been positive or negative for large countries?Why or why not

pps- I need to remember to vote

The only thing that matters is Your love

Today I ate zero things. aside from a quarter of a beet and a chocolate bunny head (which I purged)

I have drank only water and went to a spin class and almost fainted

yay skinny

must lose a minimum of three pounds by thursday so I can wear my parliament skirt to parliament

I went shopping and everything was xs or s, which made me content

also, I am becoming such a sap. Which, if you don't really know me, won't be a big deal, but really, it is. I'm in such a 'i want to be a stay at home mom later and get married and go for family walks and play couples bridge' mindset, which I'm sure Marcus is sick of (not that I say these things, but just the me talking about the future so much ) and I don't blame him.

I better be down at least a pound tomorrow!

ps- I have been reading all your blogs, but I just haven't commented lately, because I am at a loss of words lately. I do still care, and when I get my head out of my bum, I'll start commenting again :)

too much effort

Screw making a new blog,

if whoever wants to creep it

that is their business

so,

I have purged at least 4 times every day recently

my therapist got an ED clinic person to come

and she was fat.

(i mean normal people standards fat, not just mine)

but lalalala down 4 pounds since monday,

slow and steady wins the race

99+18 by monday

ps-CONGRATS NIKKI ON BEING FABULOUS + CATCHING UP TO ME

you skinny bitch <3

umm in other news, getting my nose pierced tomorrow and shopping with my man

have a fab weekend everybody!

Broth is my best friend

Veggie broth

Beef broth

Chicken broth

I love them all. They are my saviors.

I woke up at the same weight today, but I'm going to stay positive

yesterday i ate oatmeal (110) a chicken breast with spices (110) a bit of salsa (25) for a total of 245, which I am alright with

Today, I have eaten a banana (100) and my uncle is taking me to dinner at my (used to be) favorite italian restaurant. I am only going to have some lobster bisque (a soup type thing, 250 ish cals per cup) but not all of it! and a small slice of bread (if I'm forced) and tea and perhaps a bit of salad.

I got my grad pictures today. My cheeks look so fat and disgusting, my chin looks wide , my hair looks dry, I look oily, I could go on...

I'f I am not two pounds smaller by tomorrow, I will kill something.

I must lose those two pounds before my period comes! (which I think is soon, I'm so bad with figuring it out)

I have a massage today, went to the bank to talk about student loans and visas and tanned

I will NOT wreck this day with food!

going to go back and eat my broth now..mmmm broth.....

There she goes again

Salut mes amours!

Sorry for the disappearing off the face of the earth!

The past week I went snowboarding (SO sore from it) and had such an amazing time

hardly ate while I was there,

on top of the mountain, it was so peaceful and I felt like I could fly, nothing else mattered but the fresh powder...I sound like a space job, but really, it was exactly what I needed

I also suffered a couple day migraine, which means I didn't eat for a couple days,

woke up 3 pounds lighter, which isn't too shabby, going to keep this weight loss rolling, NO EXCUSES, SO sick of being a huge whale.

Also picking out my schedule for uni and it'S creating a bunch of riffs but I won't let it bring me down.

I can feel my hip bones, see my ribs a bit and my collar bones, which is fine, but not good enough at all.

Now that you have all sat on your bums and read this post, drop down and give me 20 situps and 15 jumping jacks! Hah, just kidding (but you should do it anyway)

I'll blog tomorrow too, promise! (going to start posting my intake too, gaah)

WEEOO

Salut!

I am feeling so productive!

I have painted my nails, watched Criminal Minds, attempted physics, did my server quizzes, have done everything to avoid doing my dissertation and projects, and now I have had espresso and am ready for an all nighter

Got a new phone again, this one better work longer than just a couple hours, silly blackberrys

I went down a pound from yesterday, woohoo (not enough, but at least it is a drop)

Marcus and I are hell bent on fixing us (YAY. I am seriously in love with this guy and am going to try harder to be the best I can be to myself for him and to him)

AH CAFFEINE I LOVE YOU

going camping all weekend, then to Lake Louise for some mad shreddage next weekend

Happy st patty's day tomorrow! I work and then am skipping going out to do schoolwork (yay priorities, Lord give me strength!)

ok, that is it! Back to school work and coffee and stretching and Operation Barbarossa!

xxoxoxooox

If I had a type then baby it would be you

Salut!

So I fasted (minus a small bowl of tom soup) for 2 days and lost 4 pounds!

now at 99+19.4 slight progress, but progress none the less

but I had copious amounts of spaghetti, a bit of cookie dough and cereal today,

I justified the cereal because I almost fainted before work

but that is no excuse

and the others I just binged

but I'm going to fast again until Monday

I'll eat on the days I work, but not crazy like I did today

and I am going to work out tomorrow morning

I'm having a good day aside from the binge

Went out last night, it wasn't perfect but I had fun and it made me miss my boyfriend,

I'm turning into such a sap, oh well, c'est la vie

Have a great weekend mes ami(e)s!

Quelle belle journée!

Salut mes chouettes!
Aujourd'hui, j'ai appliqué pour l'université!
J'ai hâte a voir si je serai acceptée!

....
I'm feeling very french today because i applied for university en français!
I'm quite excited because it means nobody making me eat and I never have to speak english in real life again!
WOOHOO
Last night I binged, I had some Munchies and some frog candies
but I woke up today half a pound lighter!
99+23.4
disgusting! I've gained 6 pounds in a couple months, this is gross
I am fixing it
looking at thinspo and binge prevention (yay PT)
I also got invited to go out tomorrow night with people at school
I am feeling good!!
Passez une merveilleuse nuit, je m'en vais au gym, puis je vais me bronzer!

Sexy Asian Dance Party.. Whaaaat

I'm back

and peppy

and I like my hair

I'm going to get it trimmed by a pro

and then dye it slightly darker

woot

Purged like a mofo

and have lost 3 pounds in two days

feeling good!

side note- goofed up my IT band (something in my leg apparently)

so cannot walk or work out

but I'm determined to find some kind of situp

that won't make me cry

I photograph like a fat twelve year old

Intervention: "CJ"

I want to be fat skinny. I want to not be bent over the toilet until I pass out. 
I hate my stomach. My scars. The words etched into my body. The judgements that follow me wherever I go when people notice them. I want to be free of this condemned shell. I want to be happy. I don't want to look at the blob in the mirror anymore. I don't want to face the reality that I have become. I want to see a happy girl. Clear skin. Toned body. Smiling face. Long silky hair. Beautiful collar bones. Concave stomach. A boyfriend who's smile does not try in vain to mask sadness and despair. 
Do you hear what I'm saying? I don't want the life I live anymore. I don't want this eating disorder. But I don't want to be fat. Don't you see? This is the only way I'll be happy. I will lose friends, family, opportunities, self respect, everything, on this path. But I can always create new friends, family isn't everything, self-respect can be rebuilt and opportunities will come again.
I'm willing to sacrifice everything to shed this skin, be a new, thinner person I will be proud of, what are you willing to lose?