Bienvenue à mon cerveau.
Welcome to my brain.

jeudi 7 juillet 2011

fivefivesix zeropointtwo

So yesterday I went out with a friend to the club and we made a McDo stop and I caved.
My total for yesterday was:...... 556 cals
Almost twice what I wanted, but at least it was under 600 and at least I dropped .2 pounds
(not a lot, mainly because I didn't go to the gym and I didn't purge) I am on day 3 of not purging and I am not sure if I want it to keep going. I think so long as I am eating under 500 calories, I won't feel compelled to purge. I love purging to be dead honest, the relief, the pain, the exhaustion, I love it all, but I would rather go back to just restricting because I am scared to death of my teeth getting gnarlier and restricting is better with looking good, because my stomach stays small instead of stretching because of a binge, ya know what I'm sayin?
Also, I can't bring myself to purge in this house, with the roommate or Marcus, you can hear everything in the bathroom, so restricting it must be, so I will not be fat and gross

I ate oatmeal (110) and tea (0) for breakfast, driving 6 hours today which involves tons of coffee (0) and by the time I get back, I will have missed supper and will be passing my gym, so I am bringing runners in the car. Today should be under 200 calories, there is no reason for it to be over that.

Wish me luck!

CJ

oh ps, I am aware coffee and tea do not really only have zero calories, but I ignore that in my mind because there are only 2 ish and it makes me feel better about drinking tons of it

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