Remember, remember the fifth of November

I always imagine another life before I go to sleep, another reality, another me. I'm taller (apparently 5'10 isn't tall enough for my perfect life) my hair is longer and not damaged, and curls nicely. I live in Paris or Geneva, always speaking French and German. I am in charge of some huge project for social and economic development. I have a happy, balanced, married life. and I am StickThin.

Will being StickThin really make all of that true? Will being under 100 pounds help me through school and help me get a job across the big blue sea? Will puking everyday make my life more stable?

No.No.No. It will, however, make me feel better about myself, so that I feel well enough to go to work, network, make friends, be happy and have a support system. It will make me feel confident about who I am and that confidence will show through and I will get great tips at work which will pay for my schooling so I can get a job. But in the end, I suppose it is really my brains that will get me through all this right? And a brain can't function properly if it is not being fed right?

Yes. Yes.

But, who the heck cares about all that mumbo jumbo, because I am a pound down today thanks to purging and tea and coffee and some cherries. I am pathetic

It's raining, but I am going to force myself to go to the gym anyway, do a spin class, stretch, abs and come home and study. Would have gone to church, but I don't enjoy going alone (what a lame excuse, I disgust myself)

Please Weather Man, make it nice next weekend, I want to go to the beach (granted I have lost 3 pounds) and go to the Indy Finals and to Wicked.

I hope you are all having a better, sunnier weekend than I am.

CJ

ps-on prettythin it now says 'the space between our dreams and reality'. Does he mean the space between my thighs or space as in place as in the website space? I can't stop thinking about the space between my thighs every time I see it. I may have to go puke up my egg. Crap.